When deciding on a new home it is more about picking the place you want to live than picking your neighbours. The closer in physical distance you live to your neighbours the more you are likely to see them. I had lived in my apartment in the South of France for less than a year when it hit me: This is amazing, I am living in a circle of kindness. Let me explain this further:
There is a balance between giving and receiving. For some people, myself included, I always thought I was supposed to only give. Hmm… I guess I was unconsciously blocking for receiving! Luckily this has changed over the past years. Still, starting living where I am now, I was not expecting to receive all the kindness and help I have received and keep on receiving. To give you a few examples, here are some of the kind gestures I have received from neighbours since arriving here:
- I have a neighbour who often offers me food (her friend prepares delicious dishes), a flower she has picked, lemons from a nearby garden or a new magazine to read. She is always offering to help carry items down to my car or up from my car. She offers to take my dog out for a walk whenever I am out for the day and helps organise for someone to come look after him when I travel.
- I have neighbours who have offered to drive me to the airport, and also pick me up when I arrive back from a trip.
- I have a neighbour who always asks me if I want to come along for a swim whenever she goes.
- I have a neighbour who gives Italian lessons to several of us in the apartment building.
- I have new neighbours who left a bottle of Champagne outside my door – I should have been the one offering them the welcome drink, I have been here longer!
- I have a neighbour across the road who sends me a kind text whenever she goes away for a weekend or holiday, and also when she sees me on my terrace when I am back from a trip.
One of the neighbours I mention above is 80 years old and amazing at helping everyone whenever she can. I think her way of helping in an effortless way and bringing kindness to everyone inspires the rest of us in the building. Whenever someone is ill she will find a doctor. When I needed to rent a garage to put all my storage from London she went around to estate agents to find one. If a neighbour is at the hospital she visits. She always has time for a kind gesture and never asks for anything in return.
I am used to people not minding other people’s business if they are not properly established friends. Here I am learning something new: People are minding other people’s business in a very kind way and it does not feel intrusive. It is working out perfectly for everyone. Being at the receiving end of kindness feels good. Being someone who gives out kindness feels good too. It is a win-win situation. Informal connections based on kindness are being created between neighbours. A circle of kindness starts forming. Living in this building has definitely given me a new perspective on how easily we can all bring kindness to people living next door.
Wishing you well – Annette X
